I am Tired.

I am so tired.

I am so tired from just thinking about everything I WANT to do. It’s exhausting just thinking about how much work it is going to take. Yet, I really don’t know how much it will take. I don’t know how much time it will take. I don’t know what it will cost. But I haven’t even really started yet, and… I’m tired.

All I have to give is time. And so that doesn’t really matter. It will take as long as it takes. It’s not a matter of whether or not I have time. It’s a matter of giving that time and not expecting anything back in return. Some call it a gamble. Some call it a risk. Some call it hope and some call it faith. All I know is that I can’t wait around to find out. I gotta get rested up and chase these dreams!

No need to stress.

They say “Life is what happens when you’re planning for something else.” But they also say, “the chase is more fun than the catch” and that’s why happiness is not a destination but a journey. Because our dreams are way to limited to ever imagine the true possibilities life has to offer. Stress is a limitation our body and mind impose on our spirit. Anxiety is our bodies response to a spirit longing to be elsewhere. Our mind, body, and spirit must work in harmony to practice patience and learn how to ascend the next rung in our pursuit of happiness and freedom. It is here, in harmony, that we find we are exactly where we should be. And where we heading will be even more marvelous than where we came from. Moment by moment and place by place. We are on a journey. We will get there when we need to get there. For now, there is work to do. Some of it will be fun, some of it will be maddening, and some mundane.

Be you. Do you. Love you.

I am off to the gym to continue learning how to gain energy. It’s a matter of learning how to manage time when you don’t know when you will accomplish your goals. The ability to fall in love with the process so that you do not make a decision based in fear of your limitations. Rather than pushing the boundaries to learn exactly what you’re limitations are. Right now, I am loving that process in the gym. When it comes to writing, the process has not yet emerged as a pattern I can tune into. Instead, I find myself jumping back and forth between planning – thinking about what I am going to write – and doing – writing. The planning, or thinking, is winning. Even though I know that the best laid plans turn out to be better than expected. I need to trust in the process. I need to lay down a process I trust: just like I do in the gym.

What will that be? Whatever it is, needs to be just like the process for the gym:

Improve each time.

Training Intervals.

Templated

Regular Checkups (weighing in, mirror)

Goal not dependent on time.